32 Great Hours in NYC

My weekly NYC trip was both extended and great this week! Highlights:

-yummy burger and great conversation at a noisy upper west side diner with a work colleague
-taught a fabulous 3 hour class. Did one of my favorite cases and presentations and students were super engaged.
-had take-out dinner and a whole evening mommy talk with my friend Yasmina and her beautiful 4 month old baby Elia. She is serene in her new mommy role and it was lovely to see. Here they are:
-a relaxing night in a relatively quiet hotel, sans baby monitor. aaaaahhhh.
-posh breakfast at Nice Matin, fancy omelet paired with great people watching.
-a 2 hour visit plus lunch with my cousin Rachel and her 4 week old baby Alexa. (She lives one block from the last place I worked full time in NY. I ran some errands for her before I left and it was a huge deja vu.) Here's a really blurry picture from my phone of Rachel rocking Alexa to sleep, and one from her Uncle Mike's facebook page of her all dressed up where you can actually see Alexa's eyes. Rachel is almost through the craziness of the first 6 weeks and is as fun to talk to as ever. I could have stayed all day!

- a fabulous afternoon back at school, helping to run an educational event for aspiring social entrepreneurs. I got inspired by their energy, which got me through the hour lecture on a heavy topic I had to start at 5:30pm!
-Wrapped up the day with a crazy cab ride to LaGuardia. I thought I might die as we careened across Harlem at hair-raising speeds, but I survived and had time for a leisurely undressing and redressing at security as well as to find a burrito for dinner that I ate on the plane while watching the snow flurries outside before we took off. Luckily, we made it out and after my hour plus drive from the airport, I was home by 11:20pm.

Today we're having a quiet day. Abby is stuffy, Jake is excited about his new walkie talkies that he saved up 25 STARS to buy(!!), and Mike is running around the house in a cleaning frenzy, which I'm trying hard not to interrupt!!

Abby's 12 Month Stats

"Hello, gorgeous!"
That was Abby's doctor greeting her this morning. She beamed at him, naked except for her diaper and her hair clip. And then went back to playing with her socks.

She was a little more wary than at her 9 month visit, but was a great sport, until the shots were jammed into her leg. Four of them, in groups of two. She cried bloody murder, and continued at various intervals until we got outside and she hit the 25 degree air. Then, finally, calm.

Her stats:
Weight: 27.10 pounds
Height: 32.25 inches
Head circumference: 19 inches

So, she's gained 1 pound and over 2 inches in the last 3 months. She's finally lengthening more than widening!

He noted a few things to watch and gave me some much needed advice about switching her from formula to milk and moving from a bottle to a cup. Reasonable and reassuring, as always.

This afternoon we went to the library and she read books in her stroller the whole time, happy as a clam.

What a Week!

Where do you start with a week like this one?

I sobbed nearly all day Tuesday, watching the inauguration with Abby most of the day and enjoying the up to the minute updates by my friends attending and posting pix on facebook. I am so proud, so hopeful, just like nearly everyone else, it seems!

I was struck by the huge positive spirit of the crowd, by the amount of people who were there (and arrived at 3 am!), and most of all, by the very serious and somber tone of Obama's speech. I watched it live that day, listened to it on NPR that afternoon, and read it online last night. Every time, I heard authority, a refusal to give in to fear, and an attempt to go beyond the popular phrase to the more complete, complex idea about a timeless values. Finally, I emerged liking his seriousness and intentionality, however disconnected it seemed to the popular feeling of the day.

The rest of my week was a blur. Wednesday was spent travelling to meetings in Durham and ended with a fabulous work dinner in a 5 star restaurant followed by a recouperating swim in a very strangely shaped and decorated hotel pool. Thursday I was in NY, and ended my grueling first teaching day on the snowy and pretty Columbia campus (see pic) with 4 extra hours stuck in LaGuardia, running into some work colleagues from VA that had been talking about me earlier that day, and hit my bed at home finally at midnight.

Back home on Friday, it was an intense day at home with both kids, as Jake was too sick to go to school. Today, finally, some fun - a morning playdate with one of Jake's friends from school. Actually one of his admirers. A gorgeous little girl (not even in his class!) who adores him and was dying for him to come over. She grinned from ear to ear the entire time we were there, had made Jake some valentines before we arrived, and made him paper fans while we were there. And I liked chatting with her mother. A new friend?

Perhaps most newsworthy of the week, was the discovery that my friend and former employee Jason attended an event with the Obamas on Monday (he's known Michelle for years) and ended up with his infant son's pictures in all the papers, including the FRONT PAGE of the NY TIMES on TUESDAY! Amazing. Little 10 month old Jedi (short for Jedidiah) ended up on the front page in Bangkok and beyond. See this story. Oh, and I guess that also means I am two degrees from the President. Amazing.

My glowing child, Jan 08

This is little 5-day old Abby under her bili lights during our second stay at the hospital. My job was to keep her sunglasses on (she kept tearing them off), to nurse her as needed, which at that time was every 90 minutes, and pump in between to stimulate my milk which had still not come in. I would feed her from me, then from my pumped milk, pump, wash the equipment, eat what came to me on a tray, doze for 20 minutes, and start again. I was a slobbery mess. Finally a nurse took pity on me and made a formula bottle and swaddled Abby with a smaller bili light that kept her arms away from her face and we both got some sleep. In the morning, her bili reading was better and I was rested. My milk never really came in, at least never enough to satisfy Abby. Thank god for formula!

What I love about these pix, and am so glad to finally get them off my phone, is how chunky and robust she looked, even at 5 days old. That's my girl!!

From my phone, Fall '07

I like this one of Jake on the downtown mall. He looks so content!

Xmas Fair, 2008

Just got the ability to access the photos I've taken over the past year on my mobile phone. So here's a first post, from the recent past: December's Christmas fair in our town. Jake and I went and we chowed down on hot chocolate and cookies!

Abby Turns One!

I have so many things to say about Abby turning one, I will try to condense some of my thoughts:
-my beautiful last baby is becoming a little girl
-she got all excited about the picture of cake I put on her calendar and points to it 20 times a day so that I will say, did you have CAKE??? and she can giggle.
-she LOVED it when people sang happy birthday for her; she was enraptured
-she has brought so much joy into our household, she is sunshine personified
-tonight she stuck her ladybug to the mirror while bathing, and gave herself a grand round of applause, about 20 times in a row. this lady knows how to perform!
-Abby's note to self: cupcakes are good, ice cream is not.

She's just so delicious!

Can't wait to post more pix from her two small and lovely b-day parties. And thanks to all who helped her celebrate!!

Amazement Square

Jake and I had a special day yesterday. We drove to Lynchburg and visited a kids' museum there called Amazement Square. We had such a lovely time! We also had a great lunch at the Depot across the street, and then went back to the museum again before driving home. He told me last night it was the "goodest day ever." He spent all last night recounting to Daddy all the things we'd seen. What a great last vacation day before he goes back to school on Monday!

We didn't bring a camera, but this is the Egyptian room, from their website. Not for toddlers or babies (because there are tons of stairs and strollers are not allowed), it's a great place for 3 and up. Jake's favorite exhibits were the river water exhibit, the racing bicycles, the place where you lean in to make an impression of your body, and the ball and chute room.

... and a Happy New Year!

2008 - 2009

It seems it is time to do a little year-end self reflection.

Thanks to Keris Stainton, who somehow found me on Goodreads, for the inspiration. I like this because it is simple. Just three questions!

1. What do you want to acknowledge yourself for in regard to 2008?
(What did you create? What challenges did you face with courage and strength? What promises did you keep to yourself? What brave choices did you make? What are you proud of?)

I created a new person this year, and she's wonderful! Adding her joyful spirit to my life and our family has absolutely been the high point of the year. The lowest point has been the challenge of my back problem, which was so severe over the summer I could not lift Abby or stand or sit for nearly 2 weeks. I was very scared by being so incapacitated, and it put a great deal of stress on myself and my family for a long time this year. I am proud of myself for managing to make significant efforts to heal my back, even as I went back to work part-time in the fall, and for all of the swimming and physical therapy I have made time for, even when I didn't know where it would come from!

Brave choices? Hiring a babysitter without being able to meet her first! She was out of town and we spoke by phone. When she returned from CA I found out I had made a fabulous choice. It was brave but my gut was right on. And she has become an essential part of making me feel confident that Abby (and Mike!) is well cared for while I am working.

I think I made some brave choices at the beginning of the year around Abby's feeding issues too. That was a really hard time. I cried nearly the whole weekend Abby and I spent back in the hospital, trying to combat her dehydration and jaundice. I tried so hard to live up to my expectations - pumped as long as I could and then made the tough choice to give up breastfeeding, which was clearly the right one for all of us! Then three months later I faced another feeding challenge and changed pediatricians as a result. And I ended up finding my own solution to what she needed (blending different formulas until she was satisfied). Again, I followed my gut. I am proud of figuring out what Abby needed, not following the canned advice from books or doctors.

2. What is there to grieve about 2008?
(What was disappointing? What was scary? What was hard? What can you forgive yourself for?)

I think I grieved for months over not being able to breastfeed Abby. It seems a little silly now, but it consumed me. She's so happy and healthy now. Her colic was also scary and quite exhausting. Dealing with Jake's initial disappointment in the big brother role and missing of my time and attention early in the year was hard. Actually, putting Jake in school all day, while it's been much easier in many ways, has been hard emotionally on me. He's clearly thriving, but I miss him!

3. What else do you need to say about the year to declare it complete?

Okay, the next step is to say out loud, "I declare 2008 complete!" How do you feel? If you don't feel quite right, there might be one more thing to say...

2008 was the year I completed our family. My babymaking years are now over. And we spent this year learning how to become a family of four. Now we get to concentrate on raising these kids and making this a great family, one that supports and stimulates all its members into being their best selves.

I declare 2008 complete. It feels just fine.

The final step is to consider your primary focus for the year to come. What is your primary intention or theme for 2009? Is it the year of joy? the year of self-care? the year of partnership?
Stand up and say it proud, "2009 is my year of...."

2009 is my year of fun and joy! Now that our budding toddler is showing us she will soon no longer be a baby, and my back is healing, we can start doing more, and enjoying more with a more flexible schedule. When Abby starts to really walk we'll be less stroller bound, and that will be great. I also want to use our babysitter more to help Mike and me go out and have more fun as a couple. Concerts, plays, nice meals, etc. In terms of work, I want to keep focused on the large projects and not get distracted by small things that end up being a drain. Do fewer things, but do them well, and enjoy the rest of my time with with family. This applies to the house and our possessions too - fewer things! We need to purge all the stuff from babymaking and former versions of ourselves, to streamline so that our time can be spent on activities, not things, that bring us joy.